


Triumvirate [Ménage à Trois]

by RyuuSiren7



Category: HP, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, KHR - Fandom, Katekyou Hitman Reborn!, Naruto
Genre: Adopted from Ourliazo, Attempted Murder, Comedy, Crack-ish, Gen, I mean, Jutsu, Magic, Shenanigans, Voldemort gonna go bald early from all the stress and rage, You Decide, all getting along like a house on fire, and also by Ourliazo, first chapter is actually the third, flames, go correct that cause it's a tragedy, if you don't read Ourliazo's works, is it a triumvirate or a ménage à trois, look at the characters, so business as usual really, troll!Kakashi, troll!Reborn, with a particle collider failing in the background
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2020-04-07 15:49:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19088170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RyuuSiren7/pseuds/RyuuSiren7
Summary: Before the Arcobaleno curse, Reborn visits a library in England. Before that fateful Halloween night, Voldemort sits down across from an Italian. Before Kakashi takes on a genin team, he's hit with an unidentified jutsu and encounters two very dangerous men when he tries to get home.[Adopted from Ourliazo, who has the first two chapters up on their account; link inside. They're also the one who wrote the first chapter here, not I.]





	Triumvirate [Ménage à Trois]

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Triumvirate](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10548420) by [Ourliazo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ourliazo/pseuds/Ourliazo). 



> AN: Hello homosapiens! This is actually a story I have adopted from the magnificent Ourliazo. Seriously, if you like amazing writing, go check them out. Especially if you like KHR (re: Reborn and Hibari Kyoya). In any case, this is the THIRD CHAPTER, with the first two being on their account. Additionally, this chapter first was written by the magnificent Ourliazo, not yours truly. I'll be kicking off starting the next chapter.
> 
> So, one more time for the people ignoring my AN -

_**THE FIRST TWO CHAPTERS ARE ON OURLIAZO'S ACCOUNT.** _

* * *

**Chapter Three:**  Fuck Knowledge

* * *

There's a crackle of static as the library's old speakers struggle with the command, but eventually, the droning voice of an old man is heard across the large building. "The library is closing soon, please make your way to the front desk-"

Voldemort fakes a charming smile at the other two. "It's been a  _pleasure_. I'll find you when I need you."

The Dark Lord vanishes the books back to the shelves and turns on his heel, walking towards the grand staircase that spirals through the library. He stops after a few steps and the two younger men also come to a halt beside him.

"No," Voldemort deadpans.

"Why do you carry a stick around?" Reborn asks.

"What can you do with magic?" Kakashi interrogates.

"Did you come about the powers naturally?"

"Where did the notebook go?"

"Are there others like you?"

"Where's the mysterious portal?"

Voldemort snaps up his arms, reaching out to try and clamp a hand over each of their mouths. Kakashi dodges back fast enough that he blurs and Reborn slides to the side, just out of reach.

"No, children," Voldemort deadpans, making shooing motions with his hands. "I don't want to play with you right now."

"Why not?" Reborn questions.

"One more question and you both get tortured," Voldemort promises.

"Magic has torture specific curses," Kakashi says, taking great pains to make it sound like a statement.

The Dark Lord refuses to deal with these two anymore and spins on a heel to disapparate, but Reborn darts forward and grabs onto Voldemort's arm while Kakashi flings a long piece of paper, his perfect aim sticking it to Reborn's back.

After a loud  _crack_ , Kakashi is left standing alone. He shrugs and, with a quick slice of his finger across razor-sharp canines, reverse summons himself to the tag's location.

* * *

Reborn staggers a bit with the landing, feet hitting hard stone flooring. He looks around to find a small room decorated with scribbles on the stone walls.

Voldemort wrenches his arm away from the Italian and his wand comes up. This isn't his fault – if the muggle wants to see the Death Eater base then Voldemort might as well start with the  _dungeons_.

Reborn turns fully to take in everything, not at all concerned with the annoyed Dark Lord, but Voldemort's hand comes down hard on his shoulder to hold him in place.

"Stay still." Voldemort narrows his eyes at the paper stuck to the back of Reborn's suit jacket. It looks like arithmancy.

Voldemort tries to peel it off with a quick spell but it doesn't budge. The third man (who else could it be?) clearly has something more than just good reflexes, and anything that can give Voldemort an idea of this new power is useful.

He recognizes a few ink strokes, the same standard geometry in the concentric circles and angled lines, but together they mean nothing. Considering the alternate dimension theory, it's possible that they're just using a different coding language.

Voldemort touches his wand to the paper and draws a line straight down.

* * *

Kakashi lands on a branch, surrounded by tall and definitely moving trees. The one he's crouched on shakes in indignation and he drops onto the ground instead.

There's a huge plot of land surrounded by the moving trees but it's just grass. Kakashi circles around but there is nothing and no one of any importance to be found, despite this being the tag's drop point. Maybe it fell off?

Kakashi scans the clearing and finally just hooks a thumb under the bandanna, lifting it to reveal a blood red eye.

* * *

Voldemort frowns when the paper crumples pathetically, falling off Reborn. The hitman steps away when Voldemort releases his shoulder to catch the paper. Maybe the last charm was too strong. The ink is still readable when Voldemort smooths it out, so it's not a lost cause at least.

Does it say 'hide'? No, the circles are too far apart. The smaller spirals could mean 'move', or they could just be a personalized signature like most wizards and witches add on.

"Oh," Reborn hums in satisfaction after a couple of minutes.

Voldemort ignores him. This is a specialized room for apparating into, but since it's built with no wards to protect it, a password was installed into the door in a very Diagon Alley fashion. The Italian can't leave because there physically isn't a door unless he can cast the Dark spell that-

The stones fold back onto each other.

Voldemort's head snaps up.

"I want one," Reborn admits. "Maybe in glass."

Voldemort takes a breath and… leaves it alone. That's fine, he can prioritize. Knowledge is power, just figure out where the weakness in the protection is, he can crucio the man later. "You… don't have magic."

"I can manage a couple card tricks," Reborn responds dismissively, wandering from the room. He's going to keep his flames and their activation powers quiet for now.

He steps out into the hallway just as Kakashi appears on the closest windowsill. They spend a moment looking at each other and then turn to Voldemort.

The Dark Lord is trying to digest the fact that these two muggles (albeit one with arithmancy knowledge and the other with a fondness for secret passages) just broke into his very secure headquarters with apparently no trouble at all. A small part admits that he should stop underestimating them. The larger part wants to avada everything.

Kakashi ducks and rolls under a red spiral curse and Reborn slaps away a purple ball of light with spikes by using his laptop as a tennis racket.

_Fuck knowledge_ , Voldemort is going to kill both of them and just take the Merlin forsaken laptop.

"If you calm down, he can tell you what the paper was," Reborn says, deflecting a pink sparkly one. It would have liquified his organs if it hit him.

"It's not worth the sheer  _rage_  that you both cause," Voldemort snarls.

"I can summon animals," Kakashi catches onto Reborn's plan and tries to distract the Dark Lord as well.

Voldemort flings a cobra at the man in reply.

Kakashi rips straight through it with a fuuton jutsu and Voldemort finally pauses at seeing an actual technique. Hand signs as a conductor instead of a wand. Acceptably interesting.

"Fine," Voldemort hisses. "We can discuss the Veil further, but you only stay for an hour." And then Voldemort will obliviate them after getting as much information out of the two as possible. "But neither of you touch anything, don't talk to anyone else and  _don't ask questions."_

"Can you at least introduce yourself?" Reborn demands. "I mean if we're starting a ménage à trois-"

" _No, shut up!"_

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Once again, this story is adopted from Ourliazo! Go check them out! There is a search bar in the top right corner of the screen! Also, if you want to understand what's happening. Might be best.


End file.
